warriorsfanficfandomcom-20200213-history
Weird Cat Schools/Kinderflail
what am i doing with my life STAFF Principle Bluestar KinderKats Teachers Ms. Squirrelflight Ms. Daisy First Grade Teachers Mr. Oakheart Ms. Brindleface Mr. Brambleclaw Ms. Honeyfern Second Grade Teachers Mr. Halftail Ms. Dovewing Mr. Foxleap Ms. Poppyfrost Third Grade Teachers Mr. Stormfur Ms. Graypool Mr. Whiteclaw Ms. Lilystem Fourth Grade Teachers Mr. Crowfeather Ms. Heathertail Mr. Talltail Ms. Nightcloud Gifted Teachers Mr. Graystripe Ms. Silverstream Special Teachers Blackfoot - Gym (mwhahaha) Tigerpaw - Gym assistant Wrenflight - Art Appledawn - Moosic Onewhisker - Writing Firefart - History (oh dear) Ashfoot - Science Cherryfeather - Library Classes Ms. Squirrelflight Nightkit Blackkit Foxkit Phoenixkit (Hollywhisker) Jaykit Thornkit Smartkit Rainbowkit Davekit Supercalifragilisticexpialidociouskit Ms. Daisy Lightkit Unicornkit Blazekit Lakekit Stingkit Dumbkit Moniterkit Simulatorkit Abnoxiouskit Gingerkeet Mr. Oakheart Lifekit Wavekit Dancingkit Flamingokit Giraffe Serpent Crystal Eclipsekit Bluebirdkit Tornadokit Mr. Graystripe Christmaskit Tomatokit Kattie Logicalkit Artemmie - Doggo Mr. Tallrail Shellkittie - A PERSON :O Kinderflail Meanwhile at the bus-stop... Nightkit: WOOOHOOO!! Lightkit: I'm deaf now, thanks. Nightkit: You're welcome. Blackkit: Where did Gingerkit go- Gingerkit: WHAHAHAHAHA I HERE I HERE! Blackkit: OH MY STURCLAN YOU SCAREDS MEH Nightkit: Isn't that the point of it? Lightkit: Still, it's funny to see the look on her face. Blackkit: And yours when you saw you where in Ms. Daisy's class. Lightkit: ._. touche. Nightkit: *trollface* dat ma gurl dere Ravenwing: Come on keeties the bus is just over dere now GET IN A LINE! Le kits: okie daddeh *shuffles into a line* Bus: BEEP BOOP *pulls over at their stop, everybody gets on* Nightkit: oh dear... On teh bus-bus Lifekit: I GO IN FARST GRADE NOW I SMARTR DEN ALL OF YOU! Dumbkit: NO YOU NOTS Lifekit: YAS I AM! Dumbkit: SPELL CAT! Lifekit: K-A-T! Dumbkit: YOU GOT ITS RONG! Lifekit: NO YOU DOES GOTS IT RONG! Dumbkit: SHADDUP! Nightkit: YOU BOTH GOT IT WRONG! L and D: .-. you mean we aren't the worlds smartest kats? Nightkit: No yous are not, it's spelled z-a-e-t-s-f-w-d-a-d-q L and D: ooooohhh, zaetsfwdadq! Nightkit: Yus. Blackkit: *sigh* AT SCHOOOOOOOOL Nightkit and Blackkit: See ya Lighty and Gingerkeet! Lighty and Gingerkeet: See ya Noightu and Blackeh! *de keeties go to dere classes and den eet starts.* Ms. Squirrelflight: HOI I BE YOU TEACHER GO TO DIS BASKEET AND TAKE THIS PAPR! Class: *does so* Nightkit: How ish dis paper so hard... Paper: 1+1= Nightkit: *writing noises* I think this is right.. Paper: 1+1=goldfish Blackkit: Question 4, this is impossible. Paper: 10-1= Blackkit: Hmm, it's not 8, or 7.. aha! *scribbles down answer* Paper: 10-1=chickens Blacky: Perfection! Okie I done! Paper: 1+1=trout The dog leaped the... nurwhale This is called a... tomato 10-1=chickens Ms. Squirrwl: Okie I take dat *takes everybody's papers* Nightkit's paper: 1+1=goldfish The dog leaped the...furnace This is called a...seentonce 10-1=nien Ms.Squirrel: NOIGHTKEET GO TO TEH PRENCAPELS UFFOICE! JAYKITTY YOU LEAD HER DERE! Jaykit: Fine. *gets up and escorts Nightkit out of class and down the halls to Bluestar's office. MEANWHILE IN MS. DAISY'S CLASS... Ms. Daisy: TAKE THE PAPER OR WHATEVER! Lightkit: strict much. *gets a paper* Paper: READ THIS SENTENCE! Lightkit: AH MA BRAIN MUSCLES ARE HURTING ITS TOO HARDS! Bluestar: *busts down the door* LIGHTKEETIE GINGERKEETIE COME TO THE SECRET ROOM CALLED MY OFFICE RIGHT NOW! *replaces the door and runs off* L and G: Oh no, first day and we ar- JINX! *argues about jinx while in the halls* IN LEH BLUESTAR'S OFFICE! Bluestar: You kits shall be tested out of class to see ish you like Nightkittie, and Nightkittie... Nightkit: oh dear no. Bluestar: I GIFT YOU GIFTED RANK SO SPEAK CHILD! Nightkit: OMG YAS MY NAME ISH PRETTEH! Bluestar: Yes, yes it is. Go see Mr. Graystripe, everbody else GO BACK TO CLASS OR IT'S DETENTION! Nightkit: *goes to see Graystripe* Everybody else: *goes back to class* Gym Class (Ms. Daisy) Blackfoot: Welcome to your first gym class, i'm Blackfoot, your worst enemy gym teacher for the year! Class: *silent* Blackfoot: *sigh* Anyways, today we are playing dodgeball! QUICK GRAB A BALL- too slow, Moniterkit! Moniterkit: Awww! *is whacked in the face with a neon green ball, Blackfoot blows a whistle* Blackfoot: Moniterkit is out! Good shot Stingkit! Lightkit: TIME FOR LEH BIG GU- AHWHA! *dodges a bright yellow ball going at 90mph* Blazekit: Gah, didn't get him! Wait why is that orange ball going so fa- *is given a concussion from Gingerkit* Gingerkit: NOT MY BROTHER, YOU DUNG! AVADA KEDAVRA! Lightkit: You saved me, Gingerkit! Gingerkit: Yeah yeah, now get out of my way! *shoves Lightkit to the side to get a good aim on Unicornkit* Unicornkit: *screams and yanks Abnoxiouskit infront of herself* Gingerkit: *strikes Abnoxiouskit unconscious* Ugh, she blocked me! Simulatorkit: Take this, Blazekit! Blazekit: *redirects the ball back to Simulatorkit, it knocks a tooth out* Bwhahaha, your face! TEAMS SO FAR Team Woggo Gingerkeet - In Lightkit - In Moniterkit - In Simulatorkit - Out Dumbkit - In Team Buttkickers Blazekit - Concussion (Out) Unicornkit - In Lakekit - In Abnoxiouskit - Unconscious (Out) Stingkit - In Gingerkit: Dumbkit, throw something at em! Dumbkit: Okay, Gingerkeet! *throws a chair at Lakekit, Lakekit narrowly dodges it* Lakekit: You trying to kill me or what? Stingkit: *throws a ball at Dumbkit* Dumbkit was slammed into the wall by Stingkit's ball Gingerkit: Oh you bout to get it, Stingkit! NGAHHH! *Throws an orange ball with fire coming off ti at Stingkit, it knocks Stingkit's tail dead.* Stingkit: *yowls at the top of his lungs* YAAAGGHHHH!! Gingerkit: I was aiming for the face, take that as a warning! Lightkit: *loads a bazooka* IN THE NAME OF WINDCLAN! GET REKT SUCKAS! *bazooka balls ring out around the gym* Unicornkit got rekt by Lightkit's bazooka. Stingkit was turned into a pancake by Lightkit's bazooka. Blazekit and Abnoxiouskit: *come back in the game* Team Buttkickers: *chuck a million balls at Lightkit, breaking Lightkit's nose* Lightkit: X_X Gingerkit: I avenge you, brother. *Turns to Blazekit while dramatic wind flows around her* You has hurts him, I HAS HURTS YOU! NGAHHHHHH!! *throws a giant spear at Blazekit* Blazekit was cut through by Gingerkit's spear. Blackfoot: GREAT PLAY GINGERKEET! Oh come on Blazekit, it's just a scratch. Blazekit: *is bleeding none stop* Blackfoot: Fine, but you clean that up afterwards. *sends Blazekit out of the gym to the nurse's office* TEAMS SO FAR TEAM WOGGO Gingerkeet - In Lightkit - Out Moniterkit - In Simulatorkit - In Dumbkit - Out TEAM BUTTKICKERS Blazekit Unicornkit - In Lakekit - In Abnoxiouskit - In Stingkit - Pancaked (Out) History Class (Ms. Squirrelflight) Firefart: WELCOME TO THE FIREHEART CLASS! I AM VERY NARCISSISTIC SO I LEFT A PAPER ON YOUR DESK, IT'S A TEST ABOUT ME! Class: *groans* Supercalifragilisticexpialidociouskit: Ugh. What do you think about that, Smartkit. Smartkit: I liek turtles. Calikit: I know. How about you, Rainbowkit? Rainbowkit: I think it's dumb. Calikit: Yeah. Jaykit: Well, here we go. Name: Jaykit Who was the best cat to ever live? Firestar Who was the fire that would save ThunderClan? Firestar How did Firestar find WindClan? By using his GOOD friend, Graystripe. What leader became Bluestar's apprentice? Firefart Who fell in love with the best medicine cat to ever live in the whole wide world but had his heart crushed cause ShadowClan killed her so he got revenge on ShadowClan and later caught the cat that would kill Brokenstar for the first time and soon enough the last and also blinded him? Firefart Who appointed the most epic Brambleclaw to be deputy after he knew that the weakling Graystripe was dea-''' Jaykit: *raises paw* Firefart: Yes, Jayfeath- Jaykit? Jaykit: I can't continue the test, it interferes with my religious beliefs. (Credit to Autumnsky for this spoof) Firefart: Oh, I see.. Detention. Jaykit: What? Firefart: Detention. Meet me here during lunch and don't bring the lunch box, you won't be needing it. Jaykit: No! Firefart: Yes, I say yes. Now go tell Bluestar what you did wrong. Jaykit: FINE! *storms off through the door, slamming ti behind him.* At the gifted section Graystripe: Get on the bus to go to Mountainside Middle School where we will be doing our projects! Gifted cats: *get on the bus* Graystripe: In this class you are called by apprentice names. Like Nightpaw, Christmaspaw, Tomatopaw, etc. Nightpaw: Okie. Graystripe: we are here! Windstar: Welcome to Mountainside Middle School! Here you will speak like this. Examplepaw, come here! Examplepaw padded forward with curiosity in his eyes. "Hey, i'm Examplepaw." Windstar: Yeah, like that but it can be random. Nightpaw nodded, flicking her tail with excitement. "So where is our classroom?" Graystripe glanced around himself, as if watching for something. "Firestar isn't here, we're safe. And our classroom is on the top floor." The gifted cats shuffled forwards behind Graystripe as he stalked into the large building ahead. Later in the day, the cats are getting in cars and buses to go home. Gingerkeet, Lightkit, Nightkit, and Blackkit: Over there, it's daddy! Ravenwing: Hey kids. Hop in, we'll get McKitties on the way home. Kits: Yayas! Ravenwing: *drives off* TOMORROW '''IN MS. SQUIRREL'S CLASS Squirrelflight: *writes stuff on the board* Today is Monday. First we'll have Writing Class with Onewhisker (7:40 - 9:10) Then we'll play Earth Simulator and explore Great Britain. (9:15 - 9:45) Then we'll have a test on History of Britain (9:45 - 10:20) Then we'll go to lunch in the cafeteria. (10:20 - 10: 40) Then have recess. (10:40 - 11:00) Then math happens. (11:00 - 12:00) Then we go home! Lunch: Fried voles with feather chips and blood sauce, mulberry smoothies to drink. Squirrelflight: Get prepared, class! Phoenixkit: *shuffles over to locker number 12* Jaykit: *jogs over to locker 11* Blackkit: *pads over to locker 4* Nightkit: *backflips to locker 7* Nightkit: Okay, I have my book, Everything You Need to Know About Writing, and my blue mechanical pencil. Jaykit: *holding a stick* That's high tech. Phoenixkit: *has a normal pencil* OOOOOOOOOOOOOO PRETTY!! *slips an orange grip onto the pencil* Blackkit: *black and white pen in paw* Cool. *grabs a colorful book called Writing 101* Squirrelflight: Line up, class! Class: *lines up and follows Squirrelflight to room 107, Writing class* Onewhisker: Welcome, class! Today we will be writing fictional stories! Nightkit: *hops into chair* Okie! Onewhisker: BEGIN! Class: *scribbling noises intensify* Onewhisker: *creeps around class silently, peeks over Blackkit's shoulder if cats have shoulders* What are you writing about? Blackkit: A medicine cat called Blackmask getting visions from StarClan. Onewhisker: cool. MS. DAISY'S CLASS Daisy: Today we have moosic, line up or else it's detention! Class: *scrambles into a line* Daisy: *leads class to da moosic room.* Appledawn: Welcome to music, grab an instrument and begin playing and singing! Lightkit: *grabs a flute* Gingerkeet: *grabs an electric guitar* Blazekit: *grabs a fish and a stick* Class: *grabs various things including microphones, bags of chips, pianos, and iphones* Appledawn: Sit in a circle, and we sing! Ohhhh, Firefart is dumb! *flute noises* He cannot play a drum! Firefart is dumb! He's as fat as the sun! *electric guitar kicks in* He chose Brambleclaw over Graystripe, makes us wanna cry! *somebody eats a chip* Our only wish is just one thing, That Firefart will die! *drums* Appledawn: PERFECTION! MS. SQUIRRELFLIGHT'S CLASS Squirrelflight: Now we explore Great Britain! Class: *puts on VR helmets* Squirrelflight: Select Great Britain, and meet me at the front of the castle. Class: *does so, goes to front of castle* Squirrelflight: So let's go down this path, it leaps to Fish and Pringles! MS. DAISY'S CLASS Daisy: Ugh, class, it's time for a read-aloud. Class: *groan* Daisy: How Firestar Saved the World. By Firestar. Class: *half of it dies of boredom* There was a fire in the AwesomeClan forest, and the leader, Redstar, and the medicine cat, Beautifulshine, has seen it. "The epic Firestar will save the clan from SkinnyClan, FatClan, and EvilClan!" Exclaimed the cats. Then an epic handsome cat appeared and said "Hi, I am Handsomepaw." Then Redstar made them a warrior, Handsomeface, and then a deputy, then they died of his epicness and then he was leader, Handsomestar. Then everything attacked the clan at once, but Handsomestar was too fabulous for them, and in one paw swipe all of the evil things in the world were dead. Then he raised the sun, defeated the ice, threw hands off a boat, kissed the sleeping princess, defeated the dragon, burnt the witch, saved the kits, saved the tribe of losers, killed dumbtooth, killed weakfart, beat jayfeather in a medicine cat competition, beat lionblaze in a battle, and beat hollyleaf escaping the tunnels. Daisy: The end! Lightkit: i have changed my view on life. Daisy: How? Lightkit: I now believe Firefart is dumber then I thought. Daisy: ._. JAYKIT'S DETENTION... Firestar: *spins around in chair* Welcome Jaykit.. TO YOUR DOOM! MROWWW!! *leaps at Jaykit with claws out* Jaykit: *screams* GET OFF ME YOU GARY-STU! SECTUMSEMPRA! Firestar: Gah! You deal a heavy blow, fowl traitor. I exile you from ThunderClan! Jaykit: I live in WindClan, you $@*&%! Firestar: Well then, I exile you from WindClan! Jaykit: You don't speak for Tallstar! Firestar: Then i'll just get to him! Crucio! Jaykit: DON'T GIVE THEM THE PROPHECY, HARRY! @&#^$!* Firestar: *runs off through the halls screaming "TALLSTAR, TALLSTAR, FORGIVE ME FOR THAT ONE DAY!" Jaykit: *bleeding badly in the History Class.* I'll never catch him. Wait, I have a phone. *call gingerkeet* Hello, Gingerkeet? You still have that mustang, right? Yeah, why? Because Firestar just tried to kill me, and is on his way to Tallstar to discuss getting me exiled again. Say what now? Yeah, I think he has an issue. Don't worry, I still fantasize about his death in my dreams. Good, cause I need you to catch him. You did practice jousting at summer camp. Welp, guess i'll do it. And contact Nightkit if you can, i'm bleeding out in the History Room right now. Okay, one second. Gingerkit: *calls Nightkit* Noighty, Jaykit is bleeding out in the History Room right now, Who did it? Firefart. That little #!*$%@. Yeah yeah, i'll be on my mustang riding through the halls with a spear, don't question me. You can use mine, i'd love to see you doing that. Ok, getting ready, Don't forget the helmet. Gingerkit: *hangs up.* welp. ¡ATAQUE! *charges through the halls on a horse with a spear and an iron helmet* Firestar: *fleeing for his life* Jaykit: blehh.. Nightkit: *runs in with a doctor's outfit on.* JAYKIRBY! *picks him up and flies away to the nurse's office* Gingerkit: NGAHHHH *attempts to spear Firestar* Firestar: *turns a corner and sets off a mine* GAH, MA LEG! Gingerkit: *blows something up* FOR WINDCLAN! Firestar: OH DUNG SHE'S COMIN! *runs straight to Tallstar's room.* Tallstar: *polishing his Tunneler of the Year award* Firestar: *busts through the door* TALLSTAR! One of the kits in your clan is trying to blow me up, and the other one insulted me! Exile them! Tallstar: *points a sharp stick at him* Enough, Firestar. You have controlled WindClan leaders for far too long, don't make me kill you like I planned with your deputy. Meanwhile in the forest Brambleclaw: *tries to eat a vole* Kestrelflight: Three.. Two.. One! Brambleclaw: *blows up* Back in the class room Tallstar and Firestar: *circle eachother intently* Firestar: *voice cracks* Brambleclaw isn't dead. Tallstar: Yes he is, Kestrelflight made sure of it. Kestrelflight from a far far distance: YES I DID! HE GO BOOM BOOM! Gingerkit: *blows the door out of the hinge and otu the window* Firestar! You are under arrest! Firestar: You'll never catch me! Nightkit: *busts in the door holding a lit match and a can of gasoline* Pour la révolution! *dumps the gasoline on Firestar Firestar: NOW I SMELL LIKE A CAR, WAAAAAA!! Nightkit: *puts handcuffs on Firestar* I'm burning your leadership contract, Fireheart. And your ThunderClan contract, Fire. *does so* Gingerkit: TO MAXIMUM SECURITY! *runs off with Fire* Fire: NUUUUUUUUU!! Tallstar: Well that was surprisingly easy. *calls Kestrelflight* Kestrel, do you have aim on the next target? Yes sir! Good, ThunderClan will never know what hit them. Kestrelflight: *aims a tranquilizer dart at Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and Hollyleaf.* The power of me. IN THE NURSE'S OFFICE Jaykit: *on a bed with a bunch of bandages on him* So this is our mini hospital, hmm? Blazekit: *has heart machine connected to him and a spear hole in his chest* Lightkit: *has a broken nose* Yup. Where's Gingerkit? Jaykit: Probs spearing Firestar to death. Lightkit: Cool. Leafpool: Shut up, i'm playing angry birds. YELLOW BIRD CAN YOU NOT!? Yellow bird: Why yes I can knot, how do you think I tie my shoes? *trollface* Leafpool: NHEEGHAHDGDAGAD i need a raise. Bluestar: Why yes you do. Now if you excuse me I have some cats I need to go fire. IN THE ASSEMBLY Bluestar: *on stage* ISH EVERYBODY HERE YEEET!? Everybody: Yes. Bluestar: Good. Now you may know Blackstar the gym teacher and Firestar the history teacher? They're fired. Nightkit: I'm not surprised. Lightkit: Yeah. *has bandage on nose* Blackstar sucks. Jaykit: Firestar needs to go to jail. Gingerkit: Well... Blackkit: This year was insane. Bluestar: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH RUNNING BLAH BLAH BLAH IDIOTS BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH EXPLOSIONS BLAH BLAH BLAH MATH- Nightkit: I agree. Jaykit: I think Blazekit died. Blazekit: *sprawled out unconscious on a hospital bed somewhere* Leafpool: I DO ONE TOO MANY JOBS, I QUIT! SOMEBODY LIKE SORRELTAIL CAN COME DO IT, WHY NOT CINDERPAW EVEN!? GAHHH!! *storms out in a fit of rage* Lightkit: Yup. Blackkit: Maybe we should've been home schooled after all. Nightkit: Nah. This was epic. Jaykit: I have to say I agree. Gingerkit: Well I guess we should just.. Bluestar: OH AND LEAFPOOL QUIT! The kits: Wait what? Phoenixkit: Ohhhh dear. This isn't good. Jaykit: I think i'm hyperventilating- *passes out* Nightkit: This can't be good. Bluestar: SO JUST LIKE GO HOME KITS! Kits: Ohhhh no...